Love Yourself First

There were many times during Tuesday's lecture that I wanted to jump up and say, "Yes! That's exactly right!" I totally agree that it is important to be happy with who you are before getting into a relationship. I'm sure most of us had heard this idea before in some form or another. For many of us girls it was probably phrased as "you don't need a man to make you happy." I wish there was a way to teach this to people, but most of us don't figure it out until we've been hurt by bad experiences.
I think that it is unfortunate that this concept is so hard to grasp. It would save a lot of people from psychological pain if they spent more time improving themselves instead of trying to find someone to fix them. I can't say that I've completely mastered this process, but it has helped me to understand a lot about my personal relationships. The last person I dated was rebounding from a difficult rejection, and they wanted to find someone to make them feel whole again. I'm sure all of us can guess how that turned out. If you don't like yourself it's going to be hard to like anyone else or to let them like you.
One other reason that I was so interested by this idea is because of Zora Neale Hurston's novel Their Eyes Were Watching God. I never would have thought that African American Literature would relate to Family Science until we had this lecture. For those who haven't read the book, the main character Janie is a stereotypical romantic. She spends her life looking for a man to complete her, and she ends up in two unsatisfying marriages before finding someone she's happy with. Our teacher's favorite theme to talk about was how Janie had to love herself before she could really love anyone else. Apparently Hurston really knew what it takes to make a relationship work.

~Michelle