Belonging

The sense that one needs to belong is probably one of the biggest issues that adolescents deal with. It was interesting to me that there really is no explanation of why children at this age have such a strong desire to belong to a group. I had never thought about this before, but I can't think of a solid reason either. Abstract thinking and the concept of being included or excluded is the most logical explanation. If everyone else appears to belong to a group, then a child who is left out will feel like something is missing from their life. Still, it is hard to say why adolescents (or people of any age for that matter) feel the need to be just like their peers.
I was hardly ever included in social cliques in grade school, so I know what it is like to crave that sense of belonging. I have never liked to talk a lot so I didn't have much of a way to socialize. I had friends, but I never quite felt like I was part of the in-group. I was uncomfortable being around large groups of people, because I wasn't good at approaching people unless we were close friends. I think that my self-concept played a huge part in this. I wasn't sure if people really liked me or if they were just being nice, so I would simply avoid them. I've become more social, but I still prefer to be around a few select friends whom I know I can trust to not judge me.
A good sense of belonging as an adolescent can affect a person throughout their life. It is important that parents and teachers remain aware of how children are being treated. It is a terrible feeling to be unsure of yourself as a child, and it can affect the way you interact with other people. Social exclusion can't be avoided completely, but I think that children can learn to respect everyone if they're taught early on. Children learn by examples, and if they see older children and adults excluding others, then they will most likely do the same.