The Games We Play

I thought our conversation about relationship 'games' was an extremely important thing to talk about. It's amusing how obvious these games become when looking back at past relationships. It's also interesting to analyze which games can be constructive and which are destructive. Of course there are the traditional 'getting to know you' games that we all play. Some of these can actually take the form of real games, like 20 questions. Most of the time these games are constructive, because you are showing a genuine interest in a person. If you get to the point where you are interrogating someone to find out their flaws, then things can start to become destructive.
I know that I'm guilty of playing games that can be destructive. I've been in relationships where I usual rely on the other person to take the initiative to do anything. This is because I don't always trust that people really want to be with me. The last time I used this game it turned out that I had a legitimate reason not to trust the other person. This is one case where games can be potentially destructive, but only if you don't know when to stop. If a person tests a relationship and finds out that they can't trust their partner, then they should get out of the relationship. However, if the other person proves that they can be trustworthy, it would be destructive to keep pushing them to the limit. It's also important not jump to conclusions or be accusing of the person you're dating. If someone doesn't call you when you think they should or if they don't notice your new hair cut, don't accuse them of not loving you. Games can reveal a lot about people, but they shouldn't be the ultimate factor in a decision.